Thursday, June 25, 2009

Pip's Imprisonment

Well here it is, the post explaining the absence of Pip. The story begins months ago. I walked into my office one day and found pip being assaulted in a non pg-13 manner by a larger insidious male penguin with a filthy smirk. I immediately rushed to his aid and thwarted his attacker. After a bit of consoling I was able to calm him down and get him to come out of hiding. Not but one day later the same attacker returned! I could not believe this rogue male penguin was stupid enough to try this again!

I again was able to remove the scoundrel from pip and again had to console the poor feller. Now while this had been going on some crazy woman obviously working with the rogue penguin claimed that what I was seeing was a legitimate business deal. And that she was a representative for the Flightless Birds Escort Service of Antarctica, saying that Pip requested this individual! Total lies I assure you. I know Pip, he would never stoop to such a level.

Now the next day I returned to find Pip safe and sound. Thank goodness. Unfortunately the attacker was found later that same day in multiple pieces. Someone had seemingly removed the poor fellers head. My guess is that this attacker was not only targeting pip, but others and one of his victims finally took a stand.

I returned to my office the next day to then find Pip imprisoned! I could not believe my eyes. Where was the trial? Why wasn't I called upon as a witness?? I was later informed that Pip was not tried for the murder, but actually tried as an accomplice to the murder; and apparently I was the one who would be charged for murder! Apparently the only reason i wasn't thrown in my own prison was because they couldn't create one large enough for me. Absolute lies, there was no evidence to prove this, only circumstantial surmising from the prosecution!

Here is where Pip has been living the past 5 months. a travesty I tell you!

you can see he is on 24 hour watch by an armed guard. This prison is so ruthless that they even have another inmate guarding him. This is inmate 18, i don't trust him with those crossbows. He has already made multiple threats on Pip's life.

Unfortunately I have not been able to get Pip acquitted of the charges. So there he waits in his black and white jumpsuit, wrongfully imprisoned until I can figure out how to get him out of there...

But wait who is this? Possibly some friends. Possibly devising a plot to rescue Pip from his terrible nightmare? Only time will tell, only time will tell...


Slartibartfast said...

Perhaps your next post should explain "toast"?

jeanne said...

Yes I believe you are the reason for the crime, not just an accomplice. Yes maybe he did do the dastardly deed but he did it to get your attention. Life was good for Pip in the beginning, airplane rides, exploring adventures and pictures. Oh so many pictures of little Pip smiling and you could just see the love ooze out of him. Then one dreadful day (for Pip that is) there "she' was, all pretty and smiling. Pictures of Pip became less as pictures of "her" increased. He knew he had to do something but what?! Then came the incident with the victim. "Of course" thought Pip, "If I remove the enemy then DADDY will love me again". Well, we all know how that turned out. My heart goes out to you little Pip, may the force be with you!